perfectly imperfect

I’ve been searching for acceptance for a long time, until I realized that I didn’t even have my own and that was why I always felt so heavy with the weight of other people’s resentment toward me.
truth is, though, I don’t owe anyone my perfection, especially not if I can’t even give it to myself.
truth is, maybe I’m not meant to be perfect for anyone, especially NOT myself.
what’s the fun in infallibility anyway?
I sort of love the freedom to be flawed, for perfection is an unattainable state. and even if I could somehow achieve perfection, I wouldn’t want to live with the pressure. See, now I understand that it wasn’t so much that I lacked self-love, but rather that I loved those around me with more devotion than I did myself and in doing so I gave away my power.
I’m sure that I’ll lose some people while coming into my newfound freedom, but I’m confident I’ll regain my sense of self again and that means more to me than any ol’  allegiance.

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